Evaluating My Current Situation

last night went out to chill with M_H_ and company. went down to CP, reminiscent of some good ol times! bunch of hotties everywhere, ooo i cant believe how hot the girls at CP are! but damn, i felt so damn aweful, couldnt bring myself to talk to any of them, i feel like im in real bad shit, concerning where im at with girls.

AA all over again and lacking confidence, and all sorts of analytical mind games messing with me.

im getting real angry with myself lately for several reasons.

for one thing, im not actively working towards meeting girls (outside of the worthless damn internet). i keep hanging out with the same friends doing the same old nothing but drink routine, they keep calling me up on weekends and its just SOOOO much easier to put off what i want to do, to do something else more chill. im gonna have to start looking for some people who really want to meet girls and work together to force each other to go out. i remember those talks Tyler Durden made about having to go out, getting that frame, motivation just go out and do shit. ugh... even back when going to with Flawless and S_ to DC i had that "i dont wanna go out tonight" mentality. i gotta start self-motivating myself.

another reason i been angry at, which shouldn't be the case, was my market of girls. the world is fucking cruel when it comes to first impressions, and online, shit, that thing is on a whole new level of "what you see is what you get." i spammed a bunch of more girls online on POF but im about to just give up on that. if i do continue on the online dating thing, im gonna have to look for something more intuned with my market. gaming in person is definitely more realistic for me to meet girls.

well anyways, this weekend im going to virginia beach with J_A_ and D_ and im pretty sure they wont be talkin to any chicks, but i gotta be on my shit this weekend and blow up my AA sky high. this trip to virginia beach is gonna be like my return party to getting back to talkin to girls, and i'd be damned if i dont talk to any. i gotta rework my frame to take charge in my life and do stuff by my own damn self. i better not be bullshitting about all this either, when the time to act comes, better man up and do this!!!